First Presbyterian Church
How do you eat salad after a miracle?
Sermon for February 4, 2007
by Pastor Susan Barnes

In our old testament reading, Isaiah tells the vision of his call. Our reading is found on page 635. Listen for the word of God as it is found in Isaiah 6:1-8.

1 In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord sitting on a throne, high and lofty; and the hem of his robe filled the temple. 2 Seraphs were in attendance above him; each had six wings: with two they covered their faces, and with two they covered their feet, and with two they flew. 3 And one called to another and said: "Holy, holy, holy is the LORD of hosts; the whole earth is full of his glory."

4 The pivots on the thresholds shook at the voices of those who called, and the house filled with smoke. 5 And I said: "Woe is me! I am lost, for I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips; yet my eyes have seen the King, the LORD of hosts!"

6 Then one of the seraphs flew to me, holding a live coal that had been taken from the altar with a pair of tongs. 7 The seraph touched my mouth with it and said: "Now that this has touched your lips, your guilt has departed and your sin is blotted out."

8 Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I; send me!"

This ends our reading from Isaiah.

Did you notice that in this vision, God is so huge, the temple is filled with just the hem of God's robe. Isaiah recognizes he and his tribe are not obeying God, and feels unworthy. Many of us feel unworthy to be serving God. Who are we mortals to dare to think we can be of service to God? Fire is a symbol of purification in the Hebrew Bible. So a fire burning on the holy altar is especially purifying. Isaiah knew he wasn't worthy.

The apostle Paul knew he wasn't worthy either. He was a big believer in God's grace. He knew that the troubled church in Corinth needed to know about God's grace. Listen for the word of God as it is found in 1 Corinthians 15:1-11.

1 Now I would remind you, brothers and sisters, of the good news that I proclaimed to you, which you in turn received, in which also you stand, 2 through which also you are being saved, if you hold firmly to the message that I proclaimed to you-- unless you have come to believe in vain.

3 For I handed on to you as of first importance what I in turn had received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the scriptures, 4 and that he was buried, and that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the scriptures, 5 and that he appeared to Cephas, then to the twelve.

6 Then he appeared to more than five hundred brothers and sisters at one time, most of whom are still alive, though some have died. 7 Then he appeared to James, then to all the apostles.

8 Last of all, as to one untimely born, he appeared also to me. 9 For I am the least of the apostles, unfit to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God. 10 But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace toward me has not been in vain. On the contrary, I worked harder than any of them-- though it was not I, but the grace of God that is with me.

11 Whether then it was I or they, so we proclaim and so you have come to believe.

This ends our epistle reading. The grace of God worked through Paul. He didn't claim he was worthy of it, he didn't boast about his holiness, but rather admitted his sin. God can work through any of us.

Anthem

Our gospel reading is found on page Listen for the word of God as it is found in Luke 5:1-11.

1 Once while Jesus was standing beside the lake of Gennesaret, and the crowd was pressing in on him to hear the word of God, 2 he saw two boats there at the shore of the lake; the fishermen had gone out of them and were washing their nets. 3 He got into one of the boats, the one belonging to Simon, and asked him to put out a little way from the shore. Then he sat down and taught the crowds from the boat.

4 When he had finished speaking, he said to Simon, "Put out into the deep water and let down your nets for a catch."

5 Simon answered, "Master, we have worked all night long but have caught nothing. Yet if you say so, I will let down the nets."

6 When they had done this, they caught so many fish that their nets were beginning to break. 7 So they signaled their partners in the other boat to come and help them. And they came and filled both boats, so that they began to sink.

8 But when Simon Peter saw it, he fell down at Jesus' knees, saying, "Go away from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man!" 9 For he and all who were with him were amazed at the catch of fish that they had taken; 10 and so also were James and John, sons of Zebedee, who were partners with Simon.

Then Jesus said to Simon, "Do not be afraid; from now on you will be catching people." 11 When they had brought their boats to shore, they left everything and followed him.

This ends our gospel reading.

Simon Peter's immediate response to that miracle of the catch of fish was to declare how sinful he was, how undeserving he was. “Go away Lord, for I am a sinful man.” Why wasn't he happy? I think because faced with the power of Jesus, seeing God's abundant grace in all those fish, he felt inadequate. Whatever task was ahead of him, he was not equipped. But the task he was given wasn't so daunting. Jesus said “ Do not be afraid”. Simon Peter just had to stop being afraid. Jesus told Simon Peter what he would do: catch people. In the Hebrew scriptures, catching people was a phrase to describe a time of judgment. But here, Jesus changes the meaning. The fish are a sign of God's great abundance. The disciples' work will be a sign of great abundance also.

Most of the time, when you ask people what they want in a sermon, they want a good story with a happy ending. They want the preacher to speak personally from the heart, about great things that matter. That's hard to do every week. My life usually doesn't change dramatically every seven days. I have also learned that people forget the pastors are human. There's something about that word ‘pastor' that makes people think somehow we pastors are above it all. I can assure you, it is not the case.

Much of my story is bound up in your stories. So I have to ask your permission sometimes, even when I am telling my story. I have that permission today, from "Millie" and her family. This morning "Millie" is in St. Luke's hospital in Boise in excellent spirits and pretty good health.

This week has been quite a week for me. It stated out pretty normal – working on the newsletter, trying to fit everything in. Our secretary Phoebe became very ill and left on Tuesday, so I finished typing the newsletter. I asked four people to help fold the newsletter on Thursday morning. As "Millie", three others and I were working, "Millie" suddenly fell off her chair. We helped her up, and she was a little weak, but her regular chatty and kind self. We didn't call an ambulance. We did call her beloved "Joe". She gave us the number. I drove her to the emergency room so she could be checked out. On the way in, we chatted as we walked together across the parking lot.

Then she collapsed against me.

I want to share with you my prayers for that day. Not as a great model for prayer. I'd like it to be eloquent and memorable, but it wasn't. It was just a long panicky prayer that God didn't really answer in any way I expected.

Here's how my prayer went.

“Help. This can't be the way she was supposed to die, God, in my arms on the way in to the ER. She should be able to say good-bye to "Joe" and her family, in comfort, from a bed. We were just chatting. If I had known those were her last words, I would have made a point to remember them, instead of focusing on getting her into the emergency room. Why didn't I know how serious this was? Why did I park so far away? Thanks for the wheelchair. Help me get her into the wheelchair. I should have worked out more at the gym so I would be strong enough to hold her up and lift her in. I can't lift her. Thanks for sending the nurse to help lift her. Bye "Millie". Her name's Mi/lee even if its spelled like "Millie". God, help. Where is "Joe"? Why do I have to wait? Don't they need to know her name? There's the code blue. I know its "Millie". Her heart must have stopped while we were walking in. Help help help help.

Thanks for bringing "Joe". Thanks for letting us go in.

O "Millie", look at you. 0, you look suddenly so frail. God, help "Millie". "Millie", I'll stay with you while "Joe" takes care of all sorts of procedures and conferences with the family. Our father, who art in heaven. Be in the hands, hearts and minds of all the medical people working on her care. "Millie", I hope you can hear me pray aloud, even though your body is unresponsive. I hope you know you are not alone. So many people are working to help you. God, help all nurses and doctors and technicians help "Millie". Let her feel my love for her through my fingers. Let her hear the Lord's prayer one more time. Thanks for the ventilator that's helping her breathe. They're wheeling her in to the CATScan. Help them find out what they need to know. Be with them all in that little room. Comfort and keep "Millie".

She is so still. Help me to say good-bye to her. Help me help "Joe" say good-bye to her. Let me be there for the nurses who have tried their best to revive her. Help her breathing be easy.

O God, thanks for letting "Millie" squeeze my hand. Thanks for letting her squeeze my hand again. And one more time. O God, why is she contracting so hard. Help! I don't know what to do! Thank you for the five medical people who heard my cry.

Thanks that she's breathing on her own, God. Thanks for the ventilator tube coming out so easily. May her last breaths be easy.

Thanks for bringing "Joe" back so soon. Thanks for giving her the strength to squeeze "Joe"'s hand. O God, she's moving her eyelids. She looked at "Joe". Thank you thank you, thank you, thank you. O God, she said Susan. Thank you. My name has never sounded so sweet. Thanks for your work. I am so grateful.

Thanks for the doctors. Thanks for her questions about how strange she feels. Thanks for the nurse saying, ‘I can't say why you feel that way, "Millie". Most of the people who go through what you did don't wake up to tell us how they feel.'

Thanks for letting her move her toes. O thanks for letting her make a fist and push it against the doctor's hand. O look, God, she is following directions and lifting her legs off the bed and resisting the doctors steady push against them. I am so happy God, I told the doctor I felt giddy. He said ‘Sometimes miracles happen.' That's what it is, a miracle. I'm sorry I didn't name it God. Thanks for the miracle.

Thanks for "Millie" asking if we finished getting the newsletter folded. Thank you for her words and her movement and her revival. Thank you for this miracle. Amen.”

So there it is. Three years of theological training and seventeen years of pastoral ministry, and you see how my prayer life is. I felt inadequate, like Peter did after the miracle of fish.

"Millie" is under observation, and expects to be home soon, with different medication. God didn't grant my wish to help me say good-bye to "Millie". Just hello, again.

As a pastor, I have faced some hard theological questions. Sometimes they're mine, sometimes they're other people's. Here's the one that hit me this week: “How do you eat salad after a miracle?” Because that's what the hospital cafeteria was serving that day. Salad. I expect that's what the emergency room staff ate that day. Salad. That's what Mike served with our dinner that night. Salad. I don't' know what food would have been more appropriate. Maybe a banquet with ten courses in a huge room with chandeliers, a brass band, and waiters in tuxedos. A banquet would have been in appropriate since "Millie" was allowed just ice chips. And that kind of celebration takes planning, and this miracle was too sudden to plan. That's one of the things "Millie" said over and over. “This was so sudden.” It felt that way to me too.

In Oklahoma, I used to know a very old couple. They didn't think women should be pastors, they told me the first day I was there, but I was the pastor their church had called, and I would be their pastor. When her husband died, years later, she tearfully told me they had arranged with a pastor friend thirty years ago to do their funerals. She was so sorry I wasn't doing her husband's service. Every time I visited her, she complained that God had let her live too long. Her son-in-law died young twenty years earlier and she was angry at God for taking him and not her. She had known him since he was a little boy. He was a good man. She was so angry that she had a hard time enjoying her life. I don't know why some people die and some people live. It isn't fair. I know her son-in-law had loved her and would have wanted her to be able to find joy. I wanted her to find some joy.

And so when miracles come, even when other tragic things happen around us, we are supposed to rejoice in the miracles.

When we are faced with those miracles, there is nothing we can do to adequately respond to God's grace. So we just have to keep doing what the Bible tells us. Glorify God. Enjoy the life God has given us. Treat the people we meet as if they were Christ. Love one another. Follow Jesus. Pay attention to miracles. Eat salad. Amen.